insurgents | OPEN POST.

Under different circumstances, Jim was definitely the sort to do that. But right now he wasn't sure he wanted to risk his luck, knowing that something like that would be enough for the Earl to never forgive him if he were to find out. Resisting was, however, becoming more and more difficult each time they were alone. It didn't help that Mary proved to be such a terrible temptation, something that Jim wasn't yet sure if she did on purpose or not.

"Doesn't feel like trouble," he smiled and leaned in to press a kiss to her temple as they walked. "Told you I could do it."

Mary enjoyed flirting, but she didn't necessarily mean to be a tease. She wanted him though, wanted his hands on more than just her waist and back. She wanted his lips on places other than hers. She greatly looked forward to when they would finally be married and they could do whatever they wanted with each other.

"You sound almost as if you're boasting," Mary teased. "Will you lose interest in me after you've finally won the prize?"

That right there was much more a test to Jim's patience than the long months of buttering up her father. God knows it drove him crazy to keep his hands mostly to himself when he wanted them all over her, something that was made all the more difficult by the simple fact that he knew just how badly she wanted that too.

Patience, though. The reward would be all the sweeter in the end, he was sure of that.

"Maybe I am," he admitted with a playful smile. He did look a little more serious at her question, his free hand settling over hers. "The prize is a life with you, Mary. I think it's safe to say my interest will never wane."

Mary was decidedly impatient, even if that was improper for a lady. She gave a quick glance over her shoulder to check that they were far enough away from her parents.

"It makes me glad to hear that. Now kiss me properly, Captain Kirk."

She turned and pressed her chest against his. Really she wanted him to kiss her most improperly.

It really didn't seem like she wanted to be kissed properly, no. The thought had his lips quirking in amusement, though Jim was not about to complain. He wanted it just as badly as she did, after all.

Instead he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in close, his head tipping so he could fit his lips against hers, moving softly and coaxing her into parting her own.

Mary's lips parted easily for his, inviting him to kiss her deeply. Her arms moved around his neck and she held him close. Even kissing like this before marriage was somewhat scandalous, which was why she had to make sure that they were out of anyone's eyesight. The two of them had kissed like this before, usually in the rose garden when they could steal a few moments to themselves and allow themselves to let go and feeling the racing of each other's hearts.

Jim was all too aware of how risky this was, but then part of him kind of liked the thrill of that, too. At least they were out of sight like this, far away from everyone else, hidden from view by one of the corners of the house. It was still a gamble but Jim cared very little when he could dip his tongue past her lips and taste her mouth, when he could curl his arms tight around her and feel her body pressed flush against his.

"Mmm.." Mary backed up, bringing him with her until she was up against the wall of the house. They were at a place where it dipped in, giving them a small amount of privacy. She stroked her tongue over his, loving the sensation of his tongue in her mouth. One of her hands moved up to his hair to run her fingers through it lightly.

He followed after all too gladly, pressing close to her, his body more or less pinning hers against the wall. His tongue pushed back and slid against hers, tracing the edge of her teeth and delving into her mouth in slow laps. His hands moved down to her hips, fingers curling tight around her sides, thumb pressing just so below her hipbone as he let out a pleased sound into her mouth.

It was risky, and he knew that. Anyone could have seen which way they'd gone and could have come their way, only to walk into this scene, but Jim couldn't bring himself to care about that right now. Not when Mary was this close to him.

His body felt so good pressed against hers and Mary hungrily pulled him in as close as she could. She put one of her hands on his chest, sliding it down slowly as she tried to feel all of the muscles under his shirt. "Mm, Jim.." she breathed when he pulled back for a moment, "You feel perfect." Her heart pounded against his and she lost herself in his cerulean colored eyes.

His eyes happened to be just a hint darker, already feeling aroused with even just kissing. Being pressed up this close to her was enough to drive him crazy, and the way her hand roamed down his chest and touched his muscles only made things even worse. He let out a shivered sigh, closing his eyes again as he let their foreheads rest together, his own hand reaching for hers and keeping it still on his chest.

"God, Mary... I want you terribly." Which was why this was a very bad idea, and why he had to say what he did next. "We should stop."

Pulling back was incredibly difficult and she didn't want to. Even as her forehead rested against his, she tried to steal another tiny kiss from his lips. "I want you too, Jim." Mary sighed. "The waiting is so hard, though I suppose we must. We'll be married soon enough." It was fairly killing her though. Her experience level was relatively low, but her desire for him was strong.

He pulled his other hand from her side too, since having his fingers dig into her hip wasn't exactly helping him keep control of the whole situation. He held both her hands in his own instead, lifting them up to kiss her knuckles, letting them rest against his chest and over his heart. "I just want to do this right," he said, smiling a little as he leaned away. "I'd love you just the same, but... I don't want to give your father a single reason to not give us his blessing."

More for Mary's sake than his own, honestly. He knew Mary would be torn up if she had to choose between Jim and her own family, and in all honesty, a small part of him feared that she'd go with the latter.

She sighed gently. "You're right. I don't want to jeopardize our relationship, not when Papa is so close to relenting." He inspired such strong feelings in her though, stronger than what she had felt for any man before. "Do.. do you think it is unladlylike? To.. want you, I mean."

Mary feared that. She was always flirtatious and it had ended up getting her into trouble before. Women, especially those of her class, were not supposed to be sexual beings. Mary didn't think that Jim would think badly of her, but what if he did?

[OOC: I'm not sure how familiar you are with canon, but Mary had some dubious consent sex with a guy who ended up dying in her bed and of course it caused huge problems for her in canon. I feel like even in this AU we could say that it happened, which could also be a positive for her father to say yes to Jim marrying her because Jim doesn't care if she isn't a virgin. I feel like at this point in their relationship she would have told him about it already, but if you want to play out her telling him about it, we can do that.]

Jim raised an eyebrow as his lips quirked into a small smile, looking and sounding clearly amused at her question. "Oh, yeah. There's nothing I find more dreadful than the woman I love and am to marry wanting me."

Frankly Jim couldn't care less either way. He was by no means an expert on what a lady should or shouldn't be like, and no doubt some people would think that her feelings and desires were inappropriate, but to Jim they were the opposite. He didn't care what women were supposed to be. He liked that she wanted this, that she wanted sex just as much as he did, so much so that it nearly ached to wait. And thankfully too— he expected they would have a lot of fun, once they were married and could do with each other as they pleased.

[ ooc: I'm very familiar with canon, yes! And that works for me! :) ]

Jim had a way of completely diffusing an awkward situation. It was only one of many things that Mary loved about him. She laughed, a bit embarrassed at herself.

'Of course. You are an enlightened American, a modern thinker of the 1920s, not like my stodgy lot. I suppose women are allowed to enjoy sex, in your opinion."

It wasn't really something that was spoken of in her circles. She obviously knew what it was and how it worked, but upperclass English ladies weren't supposed to enjoy sex. To be honest, Mary wasn't sure if she did or not. Her first experience had been horrifying on so many levels.

[ooc: So do you want to handwave that she already told him or do you want to do it in this thread? Also, unrelated, but Jim vs. the Dowager at some point, y/y?]

"Allowed? Women should be encouraged to enjoy sex. It's the best fun you can have without your clothes on," he added with a grin, winking teasingly at her. Because they were alone he felt like he could say these things, and as long as they weren't pressed as close as before, the temptation to do more wasn't quite as great. "What else are women supposed to do, just lie there? Where's the fun in that?"

[ ooc: if you feel it makes sense for her to have told him by now, we can handwave it. on the other hand, if you'd like to play it out, we can do it in this thread! either way Jim's reaction would be as casual and not-shocked as you'd expect, haha. And oh lord /PLEASE/. Jim would LOVE her, ngl. she tells it like it is and she is badass. Respect. ]

Mary's cheeks flushed at his words, though she was smiling. "I look forward to learning how to make you feel good. As you know, my first time was... unenjoyable."

That was an understatement. Pamuk forced himself upon her, rutted her like a hog and then died. She experienced no pleasure whatsoever, only several years of trauma and a ruined reputation. Mary knew that was part of why her father was open to her marrying Jim; Jim didn't give a damn about her reputation. He would probably have to be gentle in bed with her at first, to show her that sex could be pleasurable. Mary certainly wanted it to be.

[ooc: I can attempt a probably terrible Dowager Countess for you at some point. She will hate him, probably lol. But he might be able to charm her eventually.]

"Like I told you before, that barely counted," Jim shrugged. Some guy forcing himself on a woman wasn't sex. There was a word for it, which Jim wasn't going to use only because it was something Mary didn't seem too keen on talking about, and he understood why. It boiled his blood, though, knowing that anyone would have once called that a gentleman. Jim may have slept with a number of people himself, but he never did anything of that kind— and he could only imagine that Pamuk had done it with other women too.

"And I look forward to making you feel good too." Actually at this point, Jim would easily say that was his priority.

[ ooc: well he's an american so yes, she'd probably hate him. But it's fine, Jim likes a challenge. He charmed her dad, he can charm her grandma. ]

Mary nodded, her eyes on his chest and not his face. "You will have to be gentle with me," she said quietly. There was still some fear on her part, even if being with Jim meant being with someone she loved as opposed to someone she hardly knew. Pamuk had died in her bed and Mary wondered how much of it was her fault. Technically the man killed himself, as all she'd really been able to do was lie there. She hadn't done anything. Still, it rang in her head that he died while being with her, so she must be the cause.

Jim caught Mary's hands, cupping them with his own and pulling them to his chest. "Mary," he kissed her fingertips, then tried to get her to look at him. "I love you. I'll never do anything to hurt you, and I'll never do anything you don't want me to. If you want me to stop, then I'll stop. If when time comes you'd rather wait, then we'll wait. You can ask for whatever you want, whether it is for me to do something or to do nothing at all."

He'd be lying if he said he didn't want her terribly, but he would never try to talk her into doing something before she was ready. They had their whole lives together, after all, so one thing they'd have was time. And as she was well aware at this point, Jim could be very patient when something or someone was worth it.

She looked up, meeting his eyes and seeing how earnest he was. That was something she had always loved about him, his determination. Mary kissed him softly.

"Believe me, I know it will be different with you. We love each other. I want you, though I admit that I will be nervous on our wedding night."

They would be staying at his cottage that night so that they could have complete privacy to do as they wished.

Jim smiled again, kissing her knuckles, then letting her hands settle on his chest again as his dropped to her sides.

"That's fine. We'll work through that together." Jim felt confident enough that he could make her feel at ease, despite any initial nervousness and embarrassment. And anything that made her uncomfortable, they could just not do at all.

For now he returned that soft kiss with one of his own, lifting a hand up to cup her cheek, and smiling as he pulled away. "Should we continue our walk? Just in case your father gets suspicious and sends someone to come find us."

"Oh, I'm sure he's suspicious every moment that we're alone together."

Not that it really mattered. She was not a virgin and Jim could give a damn. But she would rather not get pregnant before she was married.

She tucked her hand back in the crook of his arm. "Yes," she said. "Let's walk for a bit more and then rejoin my family."

[ooc: wrap this and move on to their wedding night?]

[ ooc: sounds great! Should I set up a starter for us? :) ]

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